I submitted my Hatha Yoga Teacher Training application to Isha in December 2017. After an hour and a half face to face interview through Skype in February and a memorization test later in March, I waited to hear back about their final decision regarding my admission.

In the meantime, I tried to get into a regular yoga practice so as to be prepared for my training. I found it difficult to motivate myself to get on the mat and stay on the mat, not knowing about my admission results. So I would instead walk 5 miles 5 days a week.

When I finally did get my admissions letter from Isha in March, I was so thrilled it was the motivation I needed. My practice comprised of the following in that specific order. Upa yoga, Surya Kriya, Angamardhana, Shambhavi Maha Mudra, and meditation.

I had learned these practices from a certified Isha Hatha Yoga teacher, Selvi Suresh in Chennai. Every time I went home to Chennai I would learn a new sequence. Those classes came to help me a great deal now.

I enthusiastically started my new dedicated practice on April 1. When I say regular I mean daily 7 days a week, two and a half to three hours per day in the morning.

Oh my goodness! What a revelation it has been!  Day one was great! I was on a mission to get strong and I was all gung-ho about it and it was fantastic!

Day two and three saw me feeling mostly enthusiastic and on day seven my “monkey mind” started telling me how it was alright to not do the whole sequence and how it was hard and how it was alright to take a day off, what am I trying to prove and what not!!!. It was hard to finish my sequence that day but I dragged my self to see it through. I would not say it was a successful day of practice but I would not say I gave into this monkey either!

At this point, I changed my sequence to do the Angamardhana before the Surya Kriya and that made a huge difference in my practice. Angamardhana being more exerting was easier to do at the beginning of the practice than during the end. As a result, day eight was amazingly different! Monkey seemed to have vanished and I felt an intensity in my focus that I had never felt ever before. I was in balance. I was at ease. I couldn’t wait for the next day!

Day nine the Monkey returned but was lingering around and I just ignored it.

The next few days of practice were glorious! As the days progressed I realized that my fear of my ability to do this upcoming program had disappeared altogether.

The third week of practice the Monkey returned in full swing but something else had changed inside me. I was able to observe the Monkey as it tried to tell me I had been good for 3 weeks and it was ok to take it easy now. I ignored it and found an inner strength that helped me to get on my mat every morning and finish my practice. The last day of the month was surprisingly very hard to focus as I was excited that I had made it through a month and was in a rush to finish and so I did a quick version of the sequence.

The next month onwards I was unable to practice consistently due to various day to day happenings, visitors, guests, weather etc. Instead of berating myself I decided to accept the various reasons as they were and go with the flow of events and focussed mainly on being at ease with myself. So I practiced when I could and tried to squeeze in a 5-mile walk in the evenings.

Three weeks before my departure I was still unable to get back on the mat and even if I do I am unable to go through my whole routine. It is my hope that when I finally get to the ashram the focused training will get me back on track. I am going to get my butt kicked for sure! Will find out soon enough. In the meantime, I practice being at ease.